To share: as a victim of bullying and as a deeply introverted person. any group greater than 5 or 6 rendered me silent and trying to camouflage into the furniture or wallpaper. I managed or thereabouts to do presentations to my fellow classmates.
It then became no problem to speak in public, without planning what I was going to say. Why? How?
I was 25 and in a situation where a speaker to a large room of people was ranting as a homophobe about the criminality and sinfulness of sexual perverts. I was so furious that I had to speak. I can't recall exactly what I did or what I said. I was on automatic pilot, "moved by the divine spirit" or whatever. I stood and asked if I could interupt for a moment. I think that I spoke from the heart and mind for 5 or more minutes. I won over most of the audience. The guy was ushered out of the room by some of his friends.
Whenever I had to give a lecture, teach a class, speak in public, appear on television or radio I would recall that traumatic moment when my outrage and emotional pain moved me into a semi-dissociated state - when I didn't allow fear to stop me from doing what was important to me.
I am still quiet and silent most of the time but if I have something say or reason to speak in public then I simply wing it. I speak from love and the need to help, heal or benefit my audience, without a script.
If what you say is important to you or to your audience, just relax and say it. You stand where you belong. You have the right and duty to say whatever is required to support others, love others, help or heal others.
Thank you for the share, dear Ray…I bet you changed a lot of hearts and minds over the years. And even more souls. Cheers and thank you for shining your bright light.
Thanks for your affirmations. I wasn't consciously intending to sound heroic.
If someone has something to say, which is important to them or others then they should say it as kindly and caringly as possible.
As an introvert, I find other people draining of my energy, though I like people very much. The main problem for me is that many people speak for the sake of speaking. I know that it about social bonding and to avoid awkward silences. This certainly seems to run counter to the way many US people are expected to speak very loudly and contribute to the inconsequentiality of social meetings.
Well done, Clint! And, me too. Words? Love them. Speaking them publicly? Not so much. I spoke publicly at a city council last week on a trans sanctuary resolution and I was quivering like a jello mold. Fortunately, I had no GI incidents and managed some degree of coherence. Would love to hear (or read) your remarks! 🏳️🌈
I bet you kicked butt and took names…hope the resolution moves forward and that everyone can feel safer, especially our trans family members. We are all better together…
As for my speech, I posted it (but didn’t email it) over the weekend. If you’d like to peruse, here’s the link:
Thank you, Clint - the resolution passed, unanimously, at 10:30 pm the night of the vote (the meeting began at 6 pm...we queers sat there for hours to hold our elected officials accountable!). I just read your speech. WOW. Thank you. And I'm sorry you had a trifecta of loss all at once, and...me too. In 2021, my partners' mother died unexpectedly, my dad died three weeks later, and my mom two months later. I too quit my job and went dark for the better part of a year after that. Thank you for coming back, and for shining your light so brightly here on substack and beyond (and for sharing your remarks with me!). ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
CONGRATS, KEITH! On the resolution as well as the fight back from the cave. Sorry you went through a similar dark season. Here’s to brighter days and queerer nights. Cheers, dears!
And I’m so grateful that you came out, shared, and celebrated with us! Your second coming out? Third maybe? 🤔
Who’s counting. 🤪
But truly, as early as it was in your brave journey back into yourself, I was completely prepared for the “Nah, not for me” response.
I think that you may have accomplished for yourself that which keeps our hearts beating, keeps us aware, and connected—that we can still surprise ourselves.
Showing up and sharing honestly and authentically bares a vulnerable side. Thank you for your courage to do that, Nerd. I know it wasn’t easy and I’m glad it was worth it. 🙏
Clint, I truly understand those feelings... it sort of gets easier with the passage of time, the symptoms lesson just a bit each time. But Bravo to you!
Good for you! Your experience reminded me of my own "stage fright", which I suffered from for the longest time. It started when I was around 8 or 9, when I had to play piano before a roomful of my peers and their parents. I couldn't do it. It was awful and it traumatized me for life. Then as a teacher I had to stand in front of kids and "perform" on a daily basis. That helped a lot. As time passed the anxiety associated with speaking in public lessened significantly.
Thanks Clint. Mike White, and A. E. Hotchner.
Carry You by Melissa Giges: 🎹🎵
Rock me to sleep
Whisper sweetly to me
I will fall into a dream
There is nothing but hope for you and me
I can be a believer
I can be a dreamer
You will be the calm in my soul
And I will carry you across this broken road
That's the way to do it. Congratulations, Clint.
To share: as a victim of bullying and as a deeply introverted person. any group greater than 5 or 6 rendered me silent and trying to camouflage into the furniture or wallpaper. I managed or thereabouts to do presentations to my fellow classmates.
It then became no problem to speak in public, without planning what I was going to say. Why? How?
I was 25 and in a situation where a speaker to a large room of people was ranting as a homophobe about the criminality and sinfulness of sexual perverts. I was so furious that I had to speak. I can't recall exactly what I did or what I said. I was on automatic pilot, "moved by the divine spirit" or whatever. I stood and asked if I could interupt for a moment. I think that I spoke from the heart and mind for 5 or more minutes. I won over most of the audience. The guy was ushered out of the room by some of his friends.
Whenever I had to give a lecture, teach a class, speak in public, appear on television or radio I would recall that traumatic moment when my outrage and emotional pain moved me into a semi-dissociated state - when I didn't allow fear to stop me from doing what was important to me.
I am still quiet and silent most of the time but if I have something say or reason to speak in public then I simply wing it. I speak from love and the need to help, heal or benefit my audience, without a script.
If what you say is important to you or to your audience, just relax and say it. You stand where you belong. You have the right and duty to say whatever is required to support others, love others, help or heal others.
Thank you for the share, dear Ray…I bet you changed a lot of hearts and minds over the years. And even more souls. Cheers and thank you for shining your bright light.
Thanks for your affirmations. I wasn't consciously intending to sound heroic.
If someone has something to say, which is important to them or others then they should say it as kindly and caringly as possible.
As an introvert, I find other people draining of my energy, though I like people very much. The main problem for me is that many people speak for the sake of speaking. I know that it about social bonding and to avoid awkward silences. This certainly seems to run counter to the way many US people are expected to speak very loudly and contribute to the inconsequentiality of social meetings.
You’re a hero to me, dear Ray. Just sayin’…. 🌈✌️❤️
Just when I thought I couldn't like you more, you post something like this.
Appreciate it, Jerry. Cheers!
Well done, Clint! And, me too. Words? Love them. Speaking them publicly? Not so much. I spoke publicly at a city council last week on a trans sanctuary resolution and I was quivering like a jello mold. Fortunately, I had no GI incidents and managed some degree of coherence. Would love to hear (or read) your remarks! 🏳️🌈
I bet you kicked butt and took names…hope the resolution moves forward and that everyone can feel safer, especially our trans family members. We are all better together…
As for my speech, I posted it (but didn’t email it) over the weekend. If you’d like to peruse, here’s the link:
https://collidepress.com/p/getting-brave-escaping-the-cave
Thank you, Clint - the resolution passed, unanimously, at 10:30 pm the night of the vote (the meeting began at 6 pm...we queers sat there for hours to hold our elected officials accountable!). I just read your speech. WOW. Thank you. And I'm sorry you had a trifecta of loss all at once, and...me too. In 2021, my partners' mother died unexpectedly, my dad died three weeks later, and my mom two months later. I too quit my job and went dark for the better part of a year after that. Thank you for coming back, and for shining your light so brightly here on substack and beyond (and for sharing your remarks with me!). ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
CONGRATS, KEITH! On the resolution as well as the fight back from the cave. Sorry you went through a similar dark season. Here’s to brighter days and queerer nights. Cheers, dears!
Bravo, Clint! Our hero. Please share your speech with us. Pretty please, with sugar on top!
So sweet, Fred. Thank you. I posted (but didn’t really publicize) the speech over the weekend. Here’s a link, if you’re still interested: https://collidepress.com/p/getting-brave-escaping-the-cave
Cheers!
And I’m so grateful that you came out, shared, and celebrated with us! Your second coming out? Third maybe? 🤔
Who’s counting. 🤪
But truly, as early as it was in your brave journey back into yourself, I was completely prepared for the “Nah, not for me” response.
I think that you may have accomplished for yourself that which keeps our hearts beating, keeps us aware, and connected—that we can still surprise ourselves.
Showing up and sharing honestly and authentically bares a vulnerable side. Thank you for your courage to do that, Nerd. I know it wasn’t easy and I’m glad it was worth it. 🙏
You know I’m bad at numbers, Drew. BAD. :-p
As for vulnerability, I’m a tough guy. And don’t you forget it. :-p
Thank you for being more than a friend. You’re my chosen family. :-*
Speaking of numbers…😆
I stopped counting...at the best number EVER: 69! :-p
👥👥 that's a 👍 from me too, well done you, Cheers DougT 🇫🇴🇬🇧
Cheers Sixes
Clint, I truly understand those feelings... it sort of gets easier with the passage of time, the symptoms lesson just a bit each time. But Bravo to you!
Much appreciated, Keith. I had a lovely recovery weekend. Let’s keep this Pride party going!
Thank you for the shoutout and I'm proud of you. Public speaking is my Achilles heel.
You’re welcome, dear…ain’t but a thang. Your work is lovely. As for public speaking, I’d rather dance backwards in heels with a hungry gorilla. :-p
Good for you! Your experience reminded me of my own "stage fright", which I suffered from for the longest time. It started when I was around 8 or 9, when I had to play piano before a roomful of my peers and their parents. I couldn't do it. It was awful and it traumatized me for life. Then as a teacher I had to stand in front of kids and "perform" on a daily basis. That helped a lot. As time passed the anxiety associated with speaking in public lessened significantly.
Thanks, D.C. About once a decade, I agree to do some public speaking. Now I’m relieved I don’t need to do that again anytime soon. :-p