Oh boy, did this posting hit home with me! I now live in the Dallas metroplex, but blame and shame is not exclusive to Dallas residents or to way too many parents. I grew up in a north central Illinois farming town of a whopping 800 people. Let me assure you that tiny, rural villages like that are a very rich environment for promoting, e…
Oh boy, did this posting hit home with me! I now live in the Dallas metroplex, but blame and shame is not exclusive to Dallas residents or to way too many parents. I grew up in a north central Illinois farming town of a whopping 800 people. Let me assure you that tiny, rural villages like that are a very rich environment for promoting, even insisting upon, finding blame for every little or big thing. My parents were "slightly" more advanced than yours, but not that much. I often got blamed for things I didn't even do! Of course, I am not mentioning the many things I got away with and avoided getting blame as a result. But, as a result of this environment, I have always had to be very careful to try to avoid casting blame or shame unless it was critical to resolve an important issue. Mostly the blame in my childhood was originated with my father, and only rarely by my mother. And, even much more important, my mother worked very hard to make sure she passed on to me and my siblings a belief in and an approach to others where tolerance and acceptance were critically important. And for that, I am one lucky guy for certain. Thanks for sharing this heartfelt glimpse into your experiences.
Thank you, David. Glad my post struck a chord. I know Dallas doesn’t hold the copyright on blame or shame, but some of my “backsliding” Baptist family seem to consider both an artform worth passing on like a family heirloom. Imo…just say no. lol
Glad your parents were more enlightened. Appreciate you sharing your experience and for all your support. Cheers!
Oh boy, did this posting hit home with me! I now live in the Dallas metroplex, but blame and shame is not exclusive to Dallas residents or to way too many parents. I grew up in a north central Illinois farming town of a whopping 800 people. Let me assure you that tiny, rural villages like that are a very rich environment for promoting, even insisting upon, finding blame for every little or big thing. My parents were "slightly" more advanced than yours, but not that much. I often got blamed for things I didn't even do! Of course, I am not mentioning the many things I got away with and avoided getting blame as a result. But, as a result of this environment, I have always had to be very careful to try to avoid casting blame or shame unless it was critical to resolve an important issue. Mostly the blame in my childhood was originated with my father, and only rarely by my mother. And, even much more important, my mother worked very hard to make sure she passed on to me and my siblings a belief in and an approach to others where tolerance and acceptance were critically important. And for that, I am one lucky guy for certain. Thanks for sharing this heartfelt glimpse into your experiences.
Thank you, David. Glad my post struck a chord. I know Dallas doesn’t hold the copyright on blame or shame, but some of my “backsliding” Baptist family seem to consider both an artform worth passing on like a family heirloom. Imo…just say no. lol
Glad your parents were more enlightened. Appreciate you sharing your experience and for all your support. Cheers!