This is very me. I like people. I just don’t always like what happens to people in groups. Once the room turns performative, hierarchical, or vaguely high-school-with-better-skincare, I start drafting an exit plan. Give me one or two real conversations over a loud group any day.
People who are accustomed to my quiet social self don't expect more from me than I wish to give. Americans, who do not know me well, are uncomfortable with my silence. British and European silence has a different social meaning to them.
My "healing" is going as expected. My black eyes are less so but the social impact is still that I have been in a serious fist fight.
Uh HUH. Group think and “mean girl” syndrome bore the fuck out of me. I LOVE most individuals and LOATHE most groups. Much to the chagrin of some friends who are drawn to groups like moths to flames. I’ll be over here, dears. :-p
Clint, I'm a guessing you'll be mining a rich seam of answers to this post. I'm a homoalone type of self assured finding pleasure in my own company. Im a guessing it comes along in our maturity. As a younger guy I was a social butterfly sipping Nectar from every source but once you(I) reach your 'certain age' you discover your life vibe and set your stall out accordingly. Cheers DougT 🏴🇬🇧
Agreed. Even if people don’t respond, I think a lot of gay guys especially are less “outgoing” than our straight siblings. Mostly because he had to keep a “secret” from everyone for so long. For some it might have been optional, but for the rest of us…it was survival. And then we “find our tribe” and become social butterflies only to return to our natural state as relative loners. At least that’s how it’s worked for me. I’ve got my dears, nears, and queers, but there are far fewer of them than there used to be. Some self-selected out. Some were removed over time and sometimes for reasons. I’m noodling on my own trajectory, trying to figure out what makes me tick. And where I might have room to grow. Ya know…stuff! :-)
Same, David. I used to think I had two hands of friends. But one had turned out to be fair-weather friends. Oh. Well. It’s easier to multitask with one hand free. :-p
Great title. Like that you added "socially". I, in my age, have turned into more and more of a HOMOALONO. Talking to my cat and to myself is enough. I can be extroverted but I prefer the energy level of the introvert. Fondly, Michael
This is very me. I like people. I just don’t always like what happens to people in groups. Once the room turns performative, hierarchical, or vaguely high-school-with-better-skincare, I start drafting an exit plan. Give me one or two real conversations over a loud group any day.
Amen, Gino…group think and me are not friends. I’m fine to attend a high school theater production, but I can’t be in one. Age has its privileges! :-p
"Age has its privileges." I may have to steal that from you 😀
Fellow feeling. I like people, love them, but not many at once or for more than an hour.
“Not many at once or for more than hour” might be my new creed. Cheers, Uncle Ray! Hope your healing is going well…. :-*
People who are accustomed to my quiet social self don't expect more from me than I wish to give. Americans, who do not know me well, are uncomfortable with my silence. British and European silence has a different social meaning to them.
My "healing" is going as expected. My black eyes are less so but the social impact is still that I have been in a serious fist fight.
I feel this hardcore, Clint. Solidarity! 1:1 or maybe even 1:few works best for me. Groups mostly drain me dry.
Uh HUH. Group think and “mean girl” syndrome bore the fuck out of me. I LOVE most individuals and LOATHE most groups. Much to the chagrin of some friends who are drawn to groups like moths to flames. I’ll be over here, dears. :-p
I'll meet you in the quiet corner! 🥂
Well, if I’m in that corner, dear, it won’t be quiet. I’m a loudmouth, but a friendly one. :-p Cheers!
Noted! I’ll be sure to bring my ear plugs. ; )
Clint, I'm a guessing you'll be mining a rich seam of answers to this post. I'm a homoalone type of self assured finding pleasure in my own company. Im a guessing it comes along in our maturity. As a younger guy I was a social butterfly sipping Nectar from every source but once you(I) reach your 'certain age' you discover your life vibe and set your stall out accordingly. Cheers DougT 🏴🇬🇧
Agreed. Even if people don’t respond, I think a lot of gay guys especially are less “outgoing” than our straight siblings. Mostly because he had to keep a “secret” from everyone for so long. For some it might have been optional, but for the rest of us…it was survival. And then we “find our tribe” and become social butterflies only to return to our natural state as relative loners. At least that’s how it’s worked for me. I’ve got my dears, nears, and queers, but there are far fewer of them than there used to be. Some self-selected out. Some were removed over time and sometimes for reasons. I’m noodling on my own trajectory, trying to figure out what makes me tick. And where I might have room to grow. Ya know…stuff! :-)
Right on Clint in a nut shell. Cheers.
🎵🎸🏳🌈🌈🖤🤎🤍💜💙💚💛🧡❤ Thanks Clint and Jeffrey Steven Weber ❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤍🤎🖤🌈🏳🌈🎸🎵
Thank YOU, Steve, for reading and sharing a kind word. :-*
I get it. I can number my good friends on the fingers of one hand, and I’m okay with that. Quality vs quantity… works for me! Hugs, David
Same, David. I used to think I had two hands of friends. But one had turned out to be fair-weather friends. Oh. Well. It’s easier to multitask with one hand free. :-p
Great title. Like that you added "socially". I, in my age, have turned into more and more of a HOMOALONO. Talking to my cat and to myself is enough. I can be extroverted but I prefer the energy level of the introvert. Fondly, Michael
Yet another way in which our paths cross…you’re a gem and a gent, Michael!