I've had more than one friend who got detached from reality. You did what I think is the right thing: you hung in there and listened. It's what I do when one of my friends gets delusions of sainthood that make him focus on anything but what needs to happen in the moment: a purely stress-induced psychosis. I listen. Sometimes, if I think he's open to it, I nudge. Other times, I lose it an yell, which strangely enough, comforts him (he grew up in an emotionally abusive environment).
I never feel good about anything I do, I'm disturbed by it all. I hang in there and try to stay centered. It's not easy. My hurricane safety room isn't all that safe at times. Being in relationship of any kind isn't always (sometimes ever) safe or fun and games. So I can relate to the great Frank Sinatra's refrain in one song: "that's life." Hang in there. Your lists all make sense but they don't remove the big emotional wtf's when these things happen. My sympathy. Plus, isn't this a huge topic! People like to generalize about it and then move on as quickly as they can. Thanks for your honesty in relating your experience.
Thank you, Clarke, for always being such a sweet and human voice of reason in the sea of internet wtf-ness. I hope some of what I’ve said to my friend helps. I’m just sharing what little experience I’ve had, fingers crossed. Honestly, it’s a bit above my training and pay grade, though I’ve gone through many an emotional storm…so I have empathy for them. The world’s a wacky place, so the best thing I know how to do is hold on tight and try to enjoy the ride. If only it would stop doing loop-de-loops. I hate those. Cheers, my dears!
Great topic today. I have come to to the realization that I have to be responsible for my own psychological well-being. That means adjusting my attitude about life situations, choosing not to dwell on the negative, but to enjoy the positives. It also means protecting myself from some things and not allowing myself to be in some circumstances. My life is full of challenges and tough stuff, but I have never been happier. Thank you, Clint for being there for your friend and for sharing that experience with us.
Thanks, Bob. Sounds like we’re of similar minds about the bumpy roads of life: Make the best of the roadtrip! I’m not the happiest I’ve ever been, but I’m far from the unhappiest…and determined to shine whatever light I have for those going through darker times. I appreciate you kind words and support. Cheers, my dears!
I come from a land in which healthcare is free but the resources are severely stretched. Mental health seems to be a lower priority than physical. I'm sure that you believe me that I know so very well the difficulty and inadequacy we feel when speaking with someone who is no longer open to rational support.
Whatever our professional love or personal love, we may lose people (Inevitably feeling that we failed them - we didn't).
Thank you, Uncle Ray. Especially for that parenthetical. I needed to hear that. I’m not sure my friend is open to rationality at this point. So I share what I know to be true and helpful…and remain hopeful they’ll find their way back to the light. Fingers crossed. Much love, dear….
For me, I was fortunately already part of the free healthcare system and I knew what was necessary and available. I did have patients that ended their lives anyway, when I thought I had persuaded them otherwise (Hence the sense of failure).
The most remembered one was an anonymous call late one night. The someone had already taken their overdose, was very sleepy, and just wanted someone to be there with them as they slipped away. I couldn't call anyone without ending the suicidal call. When they were clearly unconscious, I ended the call, took note of the calling number and alerted the emergency services. They had already died when the services got to them.
You were there for them, dear. You didn’t fail them. You bore witness and helped them slip away with as much peace and dignity as possible. Much love and light, Uncle Ray!
Yes. I know. I sorted that out years ago. Nowadays, for me, death isn't an ending but a beginning. Or, more exactly a return to our spiritual home and family.
People, even when mentally irrational, are responsible for themselves.
Excellent piece, excellent awareness, excellent advice. Didn't realize May was Mental Health Month. I guess we get to be crazy for the other 11? (Or is it too soon?) Just finished a piece called, "The parting of the veil of life." Watch for it. Fondly, Michael
I’m either crazy or a weirdo, depending on who/when you ask. So there’s hope for us all. Look forward to reading more of your work…I’m waaaaay behind. Cheers, my dears!
🏴🇬🇧 is having a heat wave To moment drying out foundations etc. My apartments boundary wall to the park collapsed during the night. It's a pedestrianised park so not a result of vehicle striking the wall. Luckily the wall fell outwards onto the grass and not inwards onto the parked vehicle. Knowing the process it will be a longgg time before it gets repaired. It's a boundary wall from the Victorian period, no new materials can't be used etc. The joys of living in older areas 😏 Cheers Doug
Nah no a/c in most 🏴🇬🇧 homes 😁 we usually have to keep our homes warm NOT cold. 😯 The heat won't last long 😎 so I'm making the best of it. Cheers DougT
That makes sesne. It’s surprising how many homes in California don’t have a/c. My first couple of apartments only had old window units. Make the best of it…and keep hydrated. Cheers!
Thank you Clint, for being there for your friend and for all of us. Times are dark. "Circle the wagons." Compassion is understanding that we all suffer, and that we all need to take care of ourselves. Listen when friends reach out. Love them. And remember your boundaries.🌈💖🙏🏼
I’m just paying it forward. I’ve been on the other side of that phone call more times than I can remember. Without the delusions. Not exactly how to help, but I’m holding space and trying to encourage them to get more help. From my own personal experience, I’m not calling in the troops…yet. Hoping they come to their senses and call themselves. Fingers crossed. Hope you and yours are happy and healthy, despite the dark clouds. Cheers!
🌈💙
I've had more than one friend who got detached from reality. You did what I think is the right thing: you hung in there and listened. It's what I do when one of my friends gets delusions of sainthood that make him focus on anything but what needs to happen in the moment: a purely stress-induced psychosis. I listen. Sometimes, if I think he's open to it, I nudge. Other times, I lose it an yell, which strangely enough, comforts him (he grew up in an emotionally abusive environment).
I never feel good about anything I do, I'm disturbed by it all. I hang in there and try to stay centered. It's not easy. My hurricane safety room isn't all that safe at times. Being in relationship of any kind isn't always (sometimes ever) safe or fun and games. So I can relate to the great Frank Sinatra's refrain in one song: "that's life." Hang in there. Your lists all make sense but they don't remove the big emotional wtf's when these things happen. My sympathy. Plus, isn't this a huge topic! People like to generalize about it and then move on as quickly as they can. Thanks for your honesty in relating your experience.
Thank you, Clarke, for always being such a sweet and human voice of reason in the sea of internet wtf-ness. I hope some of what I’ve said to my friend helps. I’m just sharing what little experience I’ve had, fingers crossed. Honestly, it’s a bit above my training and pay grade, though I’ve gone through many an emotional storm…so I have empathy for them. The world’s a wacky place, so the best thing I know how to do is hold on tight and try to enjoy the ride. If only it would stop doing loop-de-loops. I hate those. Cheers, my dears!
Great topic today. I have come to to the realization that I have to be responsible for my own psychological well-being. That means adjusting my attitude about life situations, choosing not to dwell on the negative, but to enjoy the positives. It also means protecting myself from some things and not allowing myself to be in some circumstances. My life is full of challenges and tough stuff, but I have never been happier. Thank you, Clint for being there for your friend and for sharing that experience with us.
Thanks, Bob. Sounds like we’re of similar minds about the bumpy roads of life: Make the best of the roadtrip! I’m not the happiest I’ve ever been, but I’m far from the unhappiest…and determined to shine whatever light I have for those going through darker times. I appreciate you kind words and support. Cheers, my dears!
I come from a land in which healthcare is free but the resources are severely stretched. Mental health seems to be a lower priority than physical. I'm sure that you believe me that I know so very well the difficulty and inadequacy we feel when speaking with someone who is no longer open to rational support.
Whatever our professional love or personal love, we may lose people (Inevitably feeling that we failed them - we didn't).
Thank you, Uncle Ray. Especially for that parenthetical. I needed to hear that. I’m not sure my friend is open to rationality at this point. So I share what I know to be true and helpful…and remain hopeful they’ll find their way back to the light. Fingers crossed. Much love, dear….
For me, I was fortunately already part of the free healthcare system and I knew what was necessary and available. I did have patients that ended their lives anyway, when I thought I had persuaded them otherwise (Hence the sense of failure).
The most remembered one was an anonymous call late one night. The someone had already taken their overdose, was very sleepy, and just wanted someone to be there with them as they slipped away. I couldn't call anyone without ending the suicidal call. When they were clearly unconscious, I ended the call, took note of the calling number and alerted the emergency services. They had already died when the services got to them.
You were there for them, dear. You didn’t fail them. You bore witness and helped them slip away with as much peace and dignity as possible. Much love and light, Uncle Ray!
Yes. I know. I sorted that out years ago. Nowadays, for me, death isn't an ending but a beginning. Or, more exactly a return to our spiritual home and family.
People, even when mentally irrational, are responsible for themselves.
Excellent piece, excellent awareness, excellent advice. Didn't realize May was Mental Health Month. I guess we get to be crazy for the other 11? (Or is it too soon?) Just finished a piece called, "The parting of the veil of life." Watch for it. Fondly, Michael
I’m either crazy or a weirdo, depending on who/when you ask. So there’s hope for us all. Look forward to reading more of your work…I’m waaaaay behind. Cheers, my dears!
Ohh Brian 🫂🫂 to your friend and you and more to your needs too. Nothing smart arsed from me today. 🙏 and peace DougT🏴 🇬🇧
Nothing smart arsed? It’s chicken noodle soup for the soul, Dear Doug. Thank you for your hugs. I’ll pass them along to my friend. Big hugs back!
🏴🇬🇧 is having a heat wave To moment drying out foundations etc. My apartments boundary wall to the park collapsed during the night. It's a pedestrianised park so not a result of vehicle striking the wall. Luckily the wall fell outwards onto the grass and not inwards onto the parked vehicle. Knowing the process it will be a longgg time before it gets repaired. It's a boundary wall from the Victorian period, no new materials can't be used etc. The joys of living in older areas 😏 Cheers Doug
Wow. That’s intense. I hope you’re safe and sound. And that you’ve got a/c to fend off the heat wave. Cheers, my dears!
Nah no a/c in most 🏴🇬🇧 homes 😁 we usually have to keep our homes warm NOT cold. 😯 The heat won't last long 😎 so I'm making the best of it. Cheers DougT
That makes sesne. It’s surprising how many homes in California don’t have a/c. My first couple of apartments only had old window units. Make the best of it…and keep hydrated. Cheers!
👍
Thank you Clint, for being there for your friend and for all of us. Times are dark. "Circle the wagons." Compassion is understanding that we all suffer, and that we all need to take care of ourselves. Listen when friends reach out. Love them. And remember your boundaries.🌈💖🙏🏼
I’m just paying it forward. I’ve been on the other side of that phone call more times than I can remember. Without the delusions. Not exactly how to help, but I’m holding space and trying to encourage them to get more help. From my own personal experience, I’m not calling in the troops…yet. Hoping they come to their senses and call themselves. Fingers crossed. Hope you and yours are happy and healthy, despite the dark clouds. Cheers!