What A Man? < What A Man!

Tender Masculinity > Toxic Masculinity

Growing up, long before I realized I was gay, I was taunted for being a “sissy.”

I liked dolls and preferred “girl” stuff. Most “boy” stuff wasn’t my cup of tea.

Mostly, I tried not to let being called “sissy” hurt my feelings. Because I knew I was more than that. And also because I knew—if push came to shove—I could squish those bullies like a bug. More than one fucked around too much and found out the hard way the “chubby sissy” could and would kick their ass.

I don’t remember ever getting in trouble for responding to violence with violence. School staff and teachers just looked the other way and seemed relieved to see me defending myself, so let the occasional ass-whooping slide.

My elementary and middle school years could be oh so very Lord of the Flies. Given how quickly violence escalates today, I know that approach wouldn’t fly now. So, I’m glad I grew up when I did, without the added pressures of social media peer pressure.

While I wasn’t allowed to start a fight—by my dad, the ultimate proponent of FAFO—I was authorized to end them—by any means necessary. And even then, I reserved my wrath for the worst offenders.

A couple of years ago, I became aware of a group of “influencers”—collectively referred to by some as “the manosphere—who make their livings selling online courses to boys and young men, teaching them how to be a “real” man. Puh-leaze.

My response to their nonsense? I started making montages celebrating the kind of “real” men and “tender” masculinity I gravitate to like a moth to a flame.

As famously Marcus Aurelius said, “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.” The world doesn’t need more wannabe alpha males. It needs good guys unafraid to lead with empathy and integrity.

Masculinity isn’t some rigid checklist. It’s a spectrum—a mix of traits as unique as every man out there.

For me, being a man includes equal doses of courage, kindness, love, and respect. Being a man is about admitting when you’re wrong, learning from mistakes, helping cheer on and support others, and leaving the world a better place than you found it.

Whenever possible, be tender. Be kind. Be you, boo.

Thanks for reading…
Clint

P.S. BIG THANKS TO DOUG…for catching a big boo-boo that could have landed me in a lot of YouTube doo-doo yesterday. His eagle eyes truly saved my day and week! ❤️

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FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

• How Police Identified a Mummy Found in a Drag Queen’s Closet (Inside Edition) 📺

• The Astonishing Theft of The Mona Lisa (Buzzfeed Unsolved Network) 📺

• The True Story Behind Halston’s Downfall (The Fashion Fable) 📺

• What A Man - Linda Lyndell (Stax Records) 📺

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ON THIS DAY = DECEMBER 11

BIRTHDAYS

• 1838 = John Labatt = Canadian brewer and businessman

• 1843 = Robert Koch = German microbiologist and Nobel Prize laureate

• 1872 = René Bull = British illustrator and photographer

• 1900 = Gerd Arntz = German artist and Isotype co-creator

• 1904 = Marge = American cartoonist

• 1905 = Gilbert Roland = Mexican-American actor and singer

• 1912 = Carlo Ponti = Italian-Swiss film producer (d. 2007)

• 1913 = Jean Marais = French actor 🌈

• 1931 = Rita Moreno = Puerto Rican actor, singer, and dancer

• 1940 = Donna Mills = American actor and producer

• 1944 = Brenda Lee = American singer-songwriter

• 1944 = Michael Lang = American promoter and Woodstock co-creator

• 1944 = Teri Garr = American actor and comedian

• 1948 = Alvin Baltrop = American photographer 🌈

• 1949 = Christina Onassis = Greek-Argentine socialite and heiress

• 1954 = Jermaine Jackson = American singer-songwriter

• 1958 = Nikki Sixx = American bassist and songwriter (Mötley Crüe)

• 1967 = Mo'Nique = American comedian

• 1978 = Roy Wood, Jr. = American comedian, actor, and host

• 1979 = Rider Strong = American actor and filmmaker

• 1987 = Alex Russell = Australian actor

• 1994 = Gabriel Basso = American actor

• 1997 = Garett Nolan = American model and social media personality

EVENTS

• 1901 = Guglielmo Marconi transmits the first transatlantic radio signal from Poldhu, Cornwall, England to Saint John's, Newfoundland.

• 1913 = More than two years after it was stolen from the Louvre, Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa is recovered in Florence, Italy.

• 1934 = Bill Wilson, co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, takes his last drink and enters treatment for the final time.

• 1946 = UNICEF is established.

• 1964 = Che Guevara speaks at the United Nations General Assembly in NYC.

• 1967 = Guess Who's Coming to Dinner premieres in NYC.

• 1972 = Apollo 17 becomes the sixth and final Apollo mission to land on the Moon.

• 1973 = Mark Segal interrupts Walter Cronkite’s “CBS Evening News” broadcast by sitting on Cronkite’s desk with a sign that says “Gays Protest CBS Prejudice.”

• 1982 = San Francisco mayor Dianne Feinstein vetoes a domestic partnership bill.

• 2008 = Bernie Madoff is arrested for fraud in a $50 billion Ponzi scheme.

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PHOTO + QUOTE OF THE DAY

“It takes all kinds to make the world go 'round. If everyone was straight-laced and uptight, it would sure be a drag. We need a little tug-of-war in society.”
Nikki Sixx

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