Sticks + Stones + Tones

How + What We Say To Each Other Matters

When it comes to the internet, this ain’t my first rodeo, y’all. I’ve been here—and queer—for most of my life. Over the years, I’ve encountered my fair share of rude dudes and strangers on the internet who just wanna cuss and fuss.

While frustrating on platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube, haters and trolls will be haters and trolls. But I am sad—and a little surprised—to see these folks finding their way to Substack.

My best guess? Notes, the Twitter-like social media feature rolled out earlier this year, is bringing all the “boys will be boys” to the yard. How fun.

I haven’t felt the need to issue “friendly reminders” here before, but I think it’s about time I made my rules for internet commentary and comments clear. Because words matter. Tone matters. And I’m determined to make the communities and spaces I’m part of as safe—and sane—as possible.

So, here are the guidelines for my corner of Substack:

• BE KIND…OR REWIND (ELSEWHERE).
  In other words, don’t be a dick—or attempt to dick-tate what others “should” or “shouldn’t” like. Comment sections are spaces to share perspectives, not places for chest-thumping or mansplaining. Anyone who can’t express their opinion without being a condescending, name-calling asshole isn’t welcome here. And anyone who has a problem finding the exit will be removed.

• KEEP IT ABOVE THE BELT.
  This isn’t OnlyFans, y’all. Thanks to restrictive credit card processors, platforms that allow adult content are rare these days. So I’m not willing to risk all my hard work and livelihood just because a few folks want to indulge in online locker-room talk. If that’s your cup of tea—or kind of tearoom—head over to X (aka Xitter).

• OPINIONS AND TASTES ARE NOT FACTS.

  Most of us here are bi or gay guys who’ve likely felt ignored or unheard at some point in our lives. I get it—we cling to our opinions and tastes like a shield. And some of us brandish them like a sword. While I understand the instinct, here’s the thing: opinions aren’t facts and tastes aren’t universal. And no one was elected Chief Dick-Tater Tastemaker. At least not on my watch.

• CELEBRATE DIFFERENCES….DON’T DEBATE THEM.

  I’ve never met anyone who shares 100% of my beliefs, opinions, or values. And thank goodness for that—it’d be boring! I’m constantly amazed (and sometimes amused) by others’ perspectives, even when I don’t agree with them. But let me be clear: I have no patience or time for hateful, ignorant nonsense. Homophobia, misogyny, racism, transphobia, and xenophobia will not be tolerated.

Substack is my creative “home base”—a place to celebrate and share Creativity, Masculinity, and Pop Culture.

I hope my work fosters more civil discourse and meaningful conversations. Not just for me but for anyone who wants to engage in considerate, friendly, and fun ways.

If you’re here to build each other up and engage with respect, stick around.

If you’re here to be disrespectful, take your sticks, stones, and tones elsewhere.

Please help me keep this community open and smart…with art and heart.

Thank you for being here…and thanks for reading!
Clint

P.S. In case anyone’s looking for the Collide Press Chat, I disabled it after noticing some mistaking it for a hookup app. Sorry to be a party pooper, but that’s what DMs, Grindr, Growlr, and Scruff are for.

P.P.S. Anyone contacted by “Max”, “baddieoliver @ gmail . com”, or any aliases, please know I’ve blocked and reported his account to Substack. What a dickhead. Folks like this is why I limit comments and paywall content. If he’s contacted you, please block and report him. But don’t engage…it’s more attention and oxygen than he deserves.

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FYC = A FEW GOOD APPS

My new Mac mini—aka “Jr.”—is two weeks old today. Now that I have a computer that can keep up with me, I’ve been testing out apps my older iMac couldn’t quite handle.

These creative tools are now helping make my world more fun and productive:

• Affinity Photo (graphics + photo)

• Filmora 14 (video)

• Photomator (photo)

• Pixelmator Pro (graphics + photo)

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ON THIS DAY = NOVEMBER 24

BIRTHDAYS

• 1868 = Scott Joplin = American pianist and composer

• 1925 = William F. Buckley, Jr. = American writer and National Review founder

• 1940 = Arthur Tress = American photographer 🌈

• 1942 = Billy Connolly = Scottish comedian and actor

• 1944 = Candy Darling = American model and actress 🌈

• 1974 = Stephen Merchant = English actor and filmmaker

• 1977 = Colin Hanks = American actor

CELEBRATIONS

• Movember (November 1-30)

EVENTS

• 1835 = The Texas Provincial Government authorizes the creation of the Texas Rangers (aka the Texas Ranger Division of the Texas Department of Public Safety).

• 1859 = Charles Darwin's On the Origin of Species sells out its initial print run on its first day of publication.

• 1958 = Brenda Lee’s “Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree” is released as a single.

• 1962 = That Was the Week That Was premieres on BBC.

• 1963 = Lee Harvey Oswald, the assassin of President John F. Kennedy, is shot and killed by Jack Ruby on live television. Robert H. Jackson takes a photograph of the shooting that wins the 1964 Pulitzer Prize in Photography.

• 1967 = Craig Rodwell opens the first bookstore devoted to gay and lesbian authors in the United States, the Oscar Wilde Memorial Bookshop in NYC.

• 1971 = During a severe thunderstorm over Washington state, a hijacker calling himself Dan Cooper (aka D. B. Cooper) parachutes from a Northwest Orient Airlines flight with $200,000 in ransom money. He has never been found.

• 1974 = The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force protests an episode of NBC’s Police Woman that featured lesbian murderers in a home for aged women. The network agrees not to rerun the episode, but MCA-TV producer David Gerber keeps it in syndication release.

• 1981 = Simon & Simon premieres on CBS.

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PHOTO + QUOTE OF THE DAY

“Heckling is an act of cowardice. If you want to speak, get up in front of the microphone and speak, don't sit in the dark hiding. It's easy to hide and shout and waste people's time.”
Billy Connolly

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