I came to realise in my later years that I am demisexual. I never coped well with one-night-stands or chance encounters or guys who wanted sex first then to become friends - and friendship precluding further sex. I liked sex but I am homoromantic (actually probably bi-romantic).
I like erect penises but I haven't had sex in the past 40 years. Well, sort-of. I have wanked or sometimes fellated a rare ardent suitor but it hasn't turned me on and their interest in me dissolved after the sexual event.
I can fall in love for a moment with very many people but any sex certainly doesn't matter as a motivational force so I do not seek it and don't take any connection into a deeper relationship.
For a very short time, I put it down to my advancing age. In reviewing my previous sexual history, I concluded that sex in itself was far from beingn my main motivation. In wanted to be in love and be loved in return - thereafter I could physically respond sexually and enjoy it fully.
Yes! Thank you for so eloquently describing what so many “normal” guys have to go through to meet up with other guys. I was a single guy looking for love (or something like it) way back at the cusp of the digital/internet age…the mid 80’s. I definitely remember the bulletin boards and chat rooms that popped up everywhere, nationally as well as locally. The “regulars” of some of these groups would occasionally meet up in person at a local bar, just to “put a face with the name”. Sadly, and maybe not surprisingly, I saw a lot of the same behavior that I thought I left behind in high school, the cliquishness, the fixation on looks alone, etc. It was a little disturbing to see this again after all those years.
Fortunately, in spite of this, I met my husband, now of over 25 years, at one of these “get togethers”. But, I can look back and remember how tough it was to meet someone that kept my interest for more than 5 minutes, or didn’t just want to add me to their hookup list. Not that I was some “Bambi in the woods”, but it was frustrating at times. I have a good idea that things haven’t changed much…men are still men.
Men are indeed still men, Jeff. Congrats on finding a good one…and congrats to him on doing the same. I try to keep a sense of humor about all the dick pic dickheads. Hope they’re happy with their collection. :-)
Clint, Revealing post about today's preference for penis parades. It is part of being gay but so are firm butts, nice pecs, strong arms, good thighs, good faces, beards or not. PERSONALITY being the most important part of all those descriptors. I think I have said it before but one of the gifts of old age (I am 81) is not needing to play those games anymore. Who would want to look and if they would want to look who would want them looking? I have many years of fantasy on which I can draw! P.S. I love your humor and metaphors. PP.SS. I love Grace Jones! Fondly, Michael
If I had my druthers, I’d pick tits and ass every day of the week. But faces (with smiles) and personalities are what truly grab my attention. No dick pics. Not even if it’s museum-quality. :-p Cheers, Michael!
I'm completely onboard with your feelings here. I remember when gay flirtation and socializing practically disappeared in the face of overwhelming pressure to go "yes/no" to hooking up. And this was in bars, mind you. When actual sexual connections became all about orgasms and zero percent about possibly getting to know something about one's partner. I came out in the 1970's when all that was happening. I'd rather have a friend than a blow job, or a fuck, or whatever. Just sayin'. So yes, titillation is the name of the game for such as me. Thanks for all you do.
Duhhh Brian, well said, as much as a dik pic serves/served a purpose once your over that phase other methods of attraction come into the equation. Trouble is it took me too long to realise that 😟 TBH it was easier to reject than be rejected for whatever was the cause. For me it was getting attached that was my acheles heel in life. The Ivory Tower is my safe space now 👍 Cheers DougT🏴 🇬🇧
I feel ya, Doug. The dating apps sometimes leave me hopeless. Good thing I’m way okay being all by myself. At least I laugh at my own dumb jokes. And don’t need a dick pic to prove my worth. I’m priceless, yo. Worthless sometimes too. :-p
🎤🎸
I came to realise in my later years that I am demisexual. I never coped well with one-night-stands or chance encounters or guys who wanted sex first then to become friends - and friendship precluding further sex. I liked sex but I am homoromantic (actually probably bi-romantic).
I like erect penises but I haven't had sex in the past 40 years. Well, sort-of. I have wanked or sometimes fellated a rare ardent suitor but it hasn't turned me on and their interest in me dissolved after the sexual event.
I can fall in love for a moment with very many people but any sex certainly doesn't matter as a motivational force so I do not seek it and don't take any connection into a deeper relationship.
I’m also learning, later in life, that I’m more demisexual than I thought. Maybe demi-demisexual? Labels are convenient if not accurate. :-)
For a very short time, I put it down to my advancing age. In reviewing my previous sexual history, I concluded that sex in itself was far from beingn my main motivation. In wanted to be in love and be loved in return - thereafter I could physically respond sexually and enjoy it fully.
I get that. Totally. Cheers, my dears!
Yes! Thank you for so eloquently describing what so many “normal” guys have to go through to meet up with other guys. I was a single guy looking for love (or something like it) way back at the cusp of the digital/internet age…the mid 80’s. I definitely remember the bulletin boards and chat rooms that popped up everywhere, nationally as well as locally. The “regulars” of some of these groups would occasionally meet up in person at a local bar, just to “put a face with the name”. Sadly, and maybe not surprisingly, I saw a lot of the same behavior that I thought I left behind in high school, the cliquishness, the fixation on looks alone, etc. It was a little disturbing to see this again after all those years.
Fortunately, in spite of this, I met my husband, now of over 25 years, at one of these “get togethers”. But, I can look back and remember how tough it was to meet someone that kept my interest for more than 5 minutes, or didn’t just want to add me to their hookup list. Not that I was some “Bambi in the woods”, but it was frustrating at times. I have a good idea that things haven’t changed much…men are still men.
Men are indeed still men, Jeff. Congrats on finding a good one…and congrats to him on doing the same. I try to keep a sense of humor about all the dick pic dickheads. Hope they’re happy with their collection. :-)
Clint, Revealing post about today's preference for penis parades. It is part of being gay but so are firm butts, nice pecs, strong arms, good thighs, good faces, beards or not. PERSONALITY being the most important part of all those descriptors. I think I have said it before but one of the gifts of old age (I am 81) is not needing to play those games anymore. Who would want to look and if they would want to look who would want them looking? I have many years of fantasy on which I can draw! P.S. I love your humor and metaphors. PP.SS. I love Grace Jones! Fondly, Michael
If I had my druthers, I’d pick tits and ass every day of the week. But faces (with smiles) and personalities are what truly grab my attention. No dick pics. Not even if it’s museum-quality. :-p Cheers, Michael!
Clint, I had to chuckle and reply back to your "No dick pics. Not even if it's museum-quality." Fondly, Michael
Hehehe. I chuckled at myself on that one. Thanks for chuckling along with me. :-p
indeed after a while one simply asks: is that all there is…
Exactly… :-)
https://youtu.be/mk6Ghsnq8dA?si=CEwGD7yBZgiL-0PY
Ok folks time for a Health and Safety tutorial, you know it makes sense👍 Cheers DougT
So much tea, so much pee! :-p
Just like the water cooler gatherings you lot have in USA 👍
I'm completely onboard with your feelings here. I remember when gay flirtation and socializing practically disappeared in the face of overwhelming pressure to go "yes/no" to hooking up. And this was in bars, mind you. When actual sexual connections became all about orgasms and zero percent about possibly getting to know something about one's partner. I came out in the 1970's when all that was happening. I'd rather have a friend than a blow job, or a fuck, or whatever. Just sayin'. So yes, titillation is the name of the game for such as me. Thanks for all you do.
Thanks, Clarke. Every generation seems to have their version of the same dilemma: Are we more (or less) than the sum of our parts? I vote we are.
Duhhh Brian, well said, as much as a dik pic serves/served a purpose once your over that phase other methods of attraction come into the equation. Trouble is it took me too long to realise that 😟 TBH it was easier to reject than be rejected for whatever was the cause. For me it was getting attached that was my acheles heel in life. The Ivory Tower is my safe space now 👍 Cheers DougT🏴 🇬🇧
I feel ya, Doug. The dating apps sometimes leave me hopeless. Good thing I’m way okay being all by myself. At least I laugh at my own dumb jokes. And don’t need a dick pic to prove my worth. I’m priceless, yo. Worthless sometimes too. :-p
😎😁👍 I'll drink to that.