
Shame. For me, it’s one of the heaviest, saddest words in the English language.
How one syllable can hold so much baggage remains a mystery. But for far, far too long, shame has been welded to the topic of mental health like a ball and chain.
Today, on National Silence the Shame Day, let’s all say, loudly and proudly, “Enough!” It’s time to break the silence surrounding shame and to break the cycle of sadness that shrouds it like a fog—thick, heavy, and blinding—keeping so many of us from seeing that help and hope are out there. Literally a call or text away.
What are we collectively so ashamed of? Based on my experience, there’s much shame surrounding talking about depression, anxiety, burnout, grief, trauma, medications, and asking for help. Even daring to want to feel okay again may trigger a shame tornado for some people.
None of these discussions are shameful. And yet, here we are—in a world that still whispers “get over it” instead of shouting “you’re not alone.” Too many of us have broken down—to the ground—before we managed to figure out how to get back up and live our lives again.
It’s not easy or fun stuff to discuss.
But what’s the alternative?
Darkness and sadness?
Fuck that shit.
The truth is we can’t heal what we won’t acknowledge.
We can’t get help if we can’t/won’t admit we’re hurting.
We can’t break free if we’re still bound by fear of judgment.
That’s why today matters so much to me. Having emerged from my own depressive cave just a few months ago, I share my experience—“Turning My Light Back On”—with the hope that it might help someone else find the switch to theirs too.
Silence the Shame Day isn’t about pretending the shame doesn’t exist—it’s about dragging it into the light and taking a look at what shame really is and isn’t.
Today is about having the hard conversations with those you love. It’s about checking in with our nears, dears, and/or queers. It’s about speaking openly about breakdowns AND breakthroughs. It’s about saying, “I got you,” “I see you,” “I’ve been there,” “I’m still there,” and/or “I love you.”
Today, let’s break the chain…of shame, shame, shame. And stop being fools.
So what are a few things you can do?
Check in on yourself. Seriously. Be honest…at least to yourself.
Talk about it if you can. Out loud, online, with a friend, with a stranger.
Share your story. Be the voice you wish you’d heard when you needed it.
And, most of all, listen without prejudice or judgement. Without trying to fix everything. Just hold space and hold still while you continue moving forward.
Mental health is health.
Wellness is a right, not a luxury.
Struggling doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’re human.
Let’s not just silence the shame—let’s replace it.
With compassion. With honesty. With courage. With truth.
Let’s wise up—by opening our hearts and minds just a little more, every day….
Best wishes for peace and happiness!
Clint 🌈✌️
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I'm most probably in a different category because of my professional involvement in mental health. I believe that everyone always does their very best under the external and internal circumstances. Thus no shame or blame is attached. There may be personal responsibilities about being mentally healthier.
I may be wrong, but I suspect that shame may be stronger in the US. Certainly, many cultures would be likely to have a "pull yourself together" attitude.