On Fan Letters + Letters To The Editor

Newsletter + On This Day

Growing up, family dinner often featured a reading from the local newspaper. By my dad. He rarely bothered with the front page, the sports section, or even the op-eds. No, his favorite reading material was always from “Letters to the Editor.”

Dad read them out loud with a blend of amusement and disdain, shaking his head while speaking (with a fake British accent), pretending the letters were penned by Shakespeare himself.

He called his readings “Pomp and Circumspect.”

Once finished, he’d fold up the paper, pick up his fork, and dig into dinner with one parting thought: "Some people need to focus on the positive...or get new glasses."

My dad wasn’t a naturally positive kind of guy. In fact, he was often cranky and could even be cynical. But he had a hard time with people who could only see what was wrong in the world. And had an even harder time with the “misery loves company” crowd.

He strongly believed focusing only on what what’s going wrong prevented folks from seeing everything that was, is, or could be going right.

In that way, he was a lot like his mom—my grandmother.

Granny was a character in the best sense of the word. Though she passed away when I was but a wee lad, I remember her Technicolor, Auntie Mame-like joie de vivre.

Even while battling cancer, Granny celebrated LIFE by any means necessary and did her best to find the good in the world.

Before I could read or write, she’d drop by after work just to “help” me pen fan letters to my favorite actors or musicians. After she wrote down what I said for me, I’d scrawl my signature in crayon and off to the post office she (allegedly) went.

I don’t know if she ever actually mailed them, but I did get a few photos back.
Or I think I did. With her, any- and everything was possible.

My grandmother—also a far from perfect person—did her best to lift others up and focused on what made people great—not what dragged them down. That kind of perspective is something I’ve tried to carry forward in my adult life.

Tried being the operative word.

But after a string of recent unfortunate, unnecessary interactions with strangers on the internet, I’m tired. Tired of keyboard warriors who seem to have nothing better to do than complain and critique others. Tired of their “agendas” and “issues.”

Constructive criticism? I’m all for it. But the brand of criticism these self-appointed “big bad wolves” dish out is anything but constructive.

“Some” people will do their best to huff and puff and blow your proverbial house down. I’ve learned to batten down the hatches—by blocking them—and let them waste their hot air elsewhere. But it’s still annoying and exhausting.

In my experience, modern-day “Letters To The Editor” writers bring nothing but unrealistic demands and expectations to the table. Somehow they seem to think spewing negativity helps make the world a better place.

Newsflash: it doesn’t. They’re just being delusional assholes.

“IT IS NOT THE CRITIC WHO COUNTS: NOT THE MAN WHO POINTS OUT HOW THE STRONG MAN STUMBLES OR WHERE THE DOER OF DEEDS COULD HAVE DONE BETTER. THE CREDIT BELONGS TO THE MAN WHO IS ACTUALLY IN THE ARENA, WHOSE FACE IS MARRED BY DUST AND SWEAT AND BLOOD, WHO STRIVES VALIANTLY, WHO ERRS AND COMES UP SHORT AGAIN AND AGAIN, BECAUSE THERE IS NO EFFORT WITHOUT ERROR OR SHORTCOMING, BUT WHO KNOWS THE GREAT ENTHUSIASMS, THE GREAT DEVOTIONS, WHO SPENDS HIMSELF IN A WORTHY CAUSE; WHO, AT THE BEST, KNOWS, IN THE END, THE TRIUMPH OF HIGH ACHIEVEMENT, AND WHO, AT THE WORST, IF HE FAILS, AT LEAST HE FAILS WHILE DARING GREATLY, SO THAT HIS PLACE SHALL NEVER BE WITH THOSE COLD AND TIMID SOULS WHO KNEW NEITHER VICTORY NOR DEFEAT.”

THEODORE ROOSEVELT
SPEECH AT THE SORBONNE
PARIS = APRIL 23, 1910

I’ve always appreciated this Teddy Roosevelt quote, especially when I started getting unsolicited feedback from bullies and strangers on the internet. While they may be “in” the arena, they bought “cheap seat” just to jeer, not cheer. They aren’t creating, they aren’t taking risks, they aren’t putting their work out there for others to see.

Constructive criticism is an art form, and most complainers will never master it.
As for their unsolicited opinions…who asked them?

What exhausts me isn’t just the negativity itself—it’s how persistent and loud it can be. People who contribute little to nothing of substance seem to be the first to tear down those of us who are actually trying to do/make something good.

So, to anyone who thinks unsolicited criticism helps: STFU AND SCROLL ON.

Seriously, I wish those who don’t have anything positive or constructive to add would just keep on moving. And find a better hobby.

Personally, I’m here for the cheerleaders, the coaches, and the co-conspirators—the people who not only root for you to succeed but help you grow. They’re my tribe.

In honor of them, I’m getting back to what my grandmother taught me: writing fan letters. Only now, instead of crayons, I’ll probably use email. But the intention is the same—to spread love, encourage what I like, and focus on the good in the world.

“Some” might call this “toxic positivity.” But I don’t care what “some” think.

The world isn’t perfect. Fact. But in my experience, it’s can be a helluva lot better when you choose to focus on what’s going good instead of drowning in a stream of negativity.

So, here’s a quick note to all of you who choose to celebrate the positive:

YOU AND YOUR KINDNESS ARE APPRECIATED!

Wishing much love and light to all who know how to cheer...and be queer.

The rest? Let them stay in the cheap seats, shouting into the void. Those of us in the arena are too busy doing our thing to worry about them or their noise.

Thanks for reading and subscribing!
Clint

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FOUND PHOTO OF THE DAY

TRAVIS KELCE = IN THE ARENA

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ON THIS DAY = OCTOBER 5

BIRTHDAYS

• 1864 = Louis Lumière = French director and producer

• 1902 = Ray Kroc = American businessman

• 1907 = Mrs. Miller = American novelty singer

• 1943 = Steve Miller = American singer-songwriter

• 1950 = Jeff Conaway = American actor and singer

• 1951 = Bob Geldof = Irish singer-songwriter and philanthropist

• 1957 = Bernie Mac = American actor and comedian

• 1958 = Neil deGrasse Tyson = American astrophysicist and author

• 1959 = Maya Lin, American architect and sculptor

• 1967 = Guy Pearce = English-Australian actor

• 1975 = Kate Winslet = English actress

• 1989 = Travis Kelce = American football player

EVENTS

• 1905 = The Wright brothers pilot the Wright Flyer III in a new world record flight of 24 miles in 39 minutes.

• 1921 = The World Series is the first to be broadcast on radio.

• 1927 = Sam Warner, Polish-American director, producer, and screenwriter, co-founded Warner Bros. dies in Los Angeles, California, at the age of 40.

• 1945 = A six-month strike by Hollywood set decorators turns into a bloody riot at the gates of the Warner Brothers studio.

• 1947 = President Truman makes the first televised Oval Office address.

• 1962 = The first of the James Bond film series, based on the novels by Ian Fleming, Dr. No, is released in Britain.

• 1962 = The first Beatles single "Love Me Do" is released in Britain.

• 1970 = The Public Broadcasting Service (PBS) is founded.

• 2011 = California Governor Jerry Brown signs Seth’s Law, requiring school districts across the state have a uniform process for dealing with complaints about bullying and mandating that school personnel intervene, when safe to do so, to stop bullying.

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