Not Today, Stan

Slaying Real & Reimagined Creative Vampires

Black Light Sunrise

• Studio Saturday are my take on Artist Dates, using favorite and new techniques, tools and toys. Studio Saturdays are creative day trips (or quick detours) without destinations or road maps meant to inspire and keep creative wells well-filled.

Woke up excited to get my Studio Saturday party started. But then a random dark-cloud thought threatened to rain on my parade: “You’re not good enough.”

The bully inside my head is way more effective (and persistent) than even the most loathsome strangers on the internet. The bully inside my head knows me better than I know myself. Like Google, the bully inside my head knows all. And forgets nothing.

Long story short: I almost went back to bed, pulled the covers over my head, and called it a day. But based on much experience with real-life bullies, the only thing that (mostly) works is standing up to them and standing your ground.

Feeling creative vampires lurking all around, I decided to pull out a mix of magical musical garlic and sage words of wisdom: “Die, Vampires, Die” (from title of show) is my go-to song about slaying creative vampires. Both real and re-imagined.

• Bonus: The song never fails to help turn my dark-cloud frown upside down!

As the lyrics poured through my earbuds, I felt the familiar shift inside me.
With each beat, I could feel the weight of doubt lifting off my shoulders.
The words, like a shield against the negativity, fortified my resolve.
A white cloud of determination began taking shape.

The song reminded me that I’m not alone in this struggle. We all face moments of self-doubt, moments when the voices of bullies real and reimagined threaten to hold us back and ruin our days.

Instead of letting the bully inside my head win, I’ve decided (again) to use its taunts as fuel for my creativity. For now, for today anyway.

Writing this post is a way of turning negative energy into something positive and productive. At least that’s my goal and intention.

And you know what? The more I work, the quieter that bully becomes.

With each keystroke, I can feel its power over me diminishing.
Until it’s just a faint whisper in the back of my mind.
Until this post is (almost) finished.

To anyone wrestling with their inner critic, please remember this:

1. We are more powerful than we know and/or think.

2. We have the power to silence those critical voices, real and reimagined.

3. We have the power to pursue our passions with unwavering confidence.

4. We can slay any vampire. Just be careful of those windmills.

Whenever you find yourself in doubt (Mama Said there would be days like this), please try using a mix of musical garlic and sage to drown out the negativity. With a sweet remixed soundtrack of your own choosing.

Die, Vampires, Die…thanks for reading!
Clint

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